This is a cake with a South Youth cover on it. It is the dorkiest thing ever.

There’s this great video of Sonic Youth and company covering “I Wanna Be Your Dog” by The Stooges on some late-night SNL off-shoot that I’m not old enough to remember.  I can’t embed it because Universal Music Group (and most major record labels) have an idiotic policy regarding video embedding Read More →

The part of Matisyahu will be played by French Stewart.

In between not doing homework and not smoking weed, I like to wonder what Matisyahu is up to.  To me, Matisyahu is just one big giant train wreck Read More →

Paul in wacky England!

At Taintbrush, we like Paul Blart: Mall Cop.  We like it so much that we spent good money to see it on a beautiful Saturday afternoon, instead of doing anything more productive like painting a wall Read More →

The only good Academy Award ever given.

Just kidding!  Movies are great, art is alive even if you wouldn’t know it by watching mainstream movies, and because I’ve stopped caring about seeing every piece of Oscar bait (seriously, why would anyone want to see Revolutionary Road?) I decided Read More →

Thom Yorke & Pitchfork Media engage in some role reversal.

Like most people in the real world but almost no one in the blogosphere, I don’t give a shit about Pitchfork Media.  They have solid news coverage but what else do you expect Read More →

We laughed ourselves into asthma attacks when we first saw the trailer for Daddy Yankee’s raggaeton epic, Talento de Barrio. It’s unbelievable they could pack in such an excess of gunfire and stick-beating and a flaming car without so much as a voiceover or dialogue to explain what in the hell is going on — and just when you think you’re going to get that explanation, you get the beat to “Rompe” instead. Fucking “Rompe.” See for yourself:

It was only a matter of time before NetFlix and the weed guy came through so we could finally watch it for ourselves. Surrounded by munchies, we chose to endure the film and liveblog it so you never, ever have to. Read More →

As the questionnaire often goes, who would play you in the movie of your life?

It’s been over a decade since the Notorious B.I.G.’s death, but most of the prominent supporting characters in the biopic Notorious are in fact alive and famous.  Faith Evans, Mrs. Wallace (Biggie’s mother), Sugg Knight, Lil’ Kim, Lil’ Cease, and probably some other Lil’ friends are all still riding the fame waves in some respect, and the bar is set high for their personae and visages to dovetail before our eyes.

Then there’s Diddy.  Though Biggie’s lifetime wasn’t long enough for him to witness the full metamorphose of Diddy, he did know Puffy and Puff Daddy quite well.  Actor Derek Luke takes on the role, assuming Puffy’s mannerisms and speech patterns so well it’s hard to care that they don’t look exactly alike.  Surely to play Diddy in a movie executive produced by Diddy about Diddy’s friend is no simple Diddy task (Diddy tasks are different from regular tasks.)

One can only imagine the kind of stage direction that took place, the kind of micromanaging to which Diddy must’ve subjected Derek Luke throughout the filming.  We picture Diddy standing offstage, yelling acting instructions like:

“Yeah, yeah, now shake your shoulders like there’s a live goldfish in your hoodie.”

“Pretend you just read a book and it was the most amazing thing you ever read.  Then you turn to the cover and find out you wrote it.  Bring that emotion.”

“Now when you tell Biggie you’ll make him a millionaire, your limbs better flow like a river of Chandon before they was haters.”

“Act like you just been told you Jewish.  You got a big piece of salmon in ya mouth, and you just like, damn, feel that?”

“Throw that money in the audience like you are the whole audience, and you bout to catch your own money.”

“In this scene you a gladiator, with a roll of Glad wrap just feelin’ glad, you Gladys Knight, you the G.L.A.D. organization, that’s the Greater Los Angeles Agency on Deafness, you deaf, get that!”

“Act like you 12, you just got a cowboy birthday cake, but you a grown ass man.  Eating cowboy cake, you ain’t do that.”

Slumdog Millionaire is hampered by:

A) A refusal to ask “Why?” to connect to the constant “How?” of the plot (Why are Jamal and Latika so in love, despite getting such little screen time?  Read More →