It’s a Wednesday night and I’m on a thirty minute bike ride so I can go play some videogames in an abandoned warehouse with hundreds of other socially deficient dorks. Let me explain: earlier my friend calls me to see if I want to see Read More →
A disclaimer: I originally wrote this essay as part of a creative nonfiction class, working from David Foster Wallace’s incredible Consider the Lobster and its predecessor, M.F.K. Fisher’s Consider the Oyster. I’m perfectly aware I don’t so much as touch their masterworks and that this has turned into a creature of its own. I’m also aware that neither footnotes nor writing of this length are friendly to deal with on this here blog. I won’t be hurt if you wave the flag of TL;DR and go running back to the comforting embraces of infographics and Facebook personality quizzes, but for those of you who muscle through it: thank you! I hope you goddamn love it. Read More →
Oh, this crowd. My roommate and I are here because she called into the radio station and won tickets, and now to my right is a girl who has taken her shirt off, wearing just a leopard print push-up bra and jeans. This is what we won. Read More →
I. I think I’ve just seen my hero walk past me in a Barnes & Noble. He is almost middle-aged, wearing a ferocious beard with square-rimmed glasses, a white t-shirt Read More →
I stepped into a crowded subway car around ten this morning to see that a long stretch of seats was occupied by a urine-drenched person with his head in a box. People love to do the farmer fist gesture and say “Only in New York!” about things like this but let’s acknowledge that this is a rare and sad morning sight, not just a souvenir in story form. Read More →
Michael Jackson is dead but I am not. This should be enough to make me happy about life, and I am. But plenty of people are not happy about life in the week following Read More →
DISCLAIMER: This is my LiveJournal. OK cool, so.
I spent almost my entire nineteenth birthday in the bathtub experiencing the First Great Meltdown of my adultish life. I’ve selectively forgotten what that was all about, but I need not invent any metaphors to illustrate the fact that I was soaking in lukewarm meta-pity. Read More →
The eclipse of the mind and the heart that occurs when one comes across Extra Long Twizzlers for the first time.
It's a Wednesday night and I'm on a thirty minute bike ride so I can go play some videogames in ...
(photo via) A disclaimer: I originally wrote this essay as part of a creative nonfiction class, working from David Foster Wallace's ...
These are some jams I liked a lot in 2009 and why. They are pretty typical and I am boring, but with respect blow me.
Oh, this crowd. My roommate and I are here because she called into the radio station and won tickets, and ...